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Thursday, May 20, 2004

Gig introduction

Oh okay the line formatting looks strange in preview but not necessarily in the actual post.

I got a phone call yesterday for a last minute brief gig today at a Health Workers conference. I'll tell you more after the weekend.

I was asked to write an introduction for myself for the MC to read. I am dreading a humourless MC. Actually that might work if s/he reads it verbatim deadpan. Worse would be a "funny" MC who decides to editorialize and ruin my masterpiece below over which I've just slaved for 10 or 12 minutes:

Richard Pepper was born approximately 30 years ago in 1959 in Winchester, England. Four years later he moved to Fort William in order to watch the Beatles on Ed Sullivan. His parents and siblings decided to accompany him, which was darned decent of them, I'd say.

After watching man land on the moon, he was understandably inspired to amalgamate Fort William with that other town north of here and name them "Pfort Arthuriam". Sadly, the name never did catch on.

However, his greatest claim to fame is that he single-handedly dissolved the Soviet Union. This is indeed a great claim. It is truly incredible.

Do you know that if you look at the word "claim" for a long time, it looks really weird?

Richard frequently sings songs into the CBC radio contest voice mail in a bid to exceed his quota of 15 minutes of fame &/or be discovered and eventually take over Rex Murphy's job.

So put your hands together and move them apart and then put them together again and then move them apart and then put them together again and move them apart and repeat according to taste for the song stylings of ... Richard Pepper.

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